My Top 10 list for 2008

Unless someone busts out a great song in the next 30 days...this is my final list, in no particular order:

1 Womanizer/Britney Spears
2. Viva La Vida/Coldplay
3. Lost/Coldplay Featuring Jay-Z
4. I Kissed a Girl/Katy Perry
5. Mercy/Duffy
6. Kids/MGMT
7. Low/Flo Rida
8. Supermassive Black Hole/Muse
9. Shadowplay/Killers
10. American Boy/Estelle Featuring Kanye

Yours?

Heart Attack

I had one this week. It was not fun.

So--Lance was traveling this week, and he spent 3 days in Montreal. When he travels, I'm on high alert--I wake up if I hear suspicious noises, cracks, or rattling. Considering the fact that I have a dog in and live in a creaky old house, I hear these things a lot. I should be used to it, but I'm not. One way I deal with it is to try and think rationally about the noises when they first wake me up. Here are my steps:

1. Identify the noise (cat on roof, house settling, wind...)
2. Do a little investigating (check to see if anything/anyone tripped the motion detectors)
3. Tell myself it's fine
4. Go right back to sleep.

Last night, I heard what I thought was the cat on the roof again. I was just about to go back to sleep when I realized the sound was actually in my room. I thought Logan had somehow escaped his cage when something next to me started moving in the bed. I touched it, and tried to identify what it was...then I realized if it were Logan, he wouldn't be under the covers, he would be on top of them.

I flew out of bed and ran for the lights. The second my hand reached for the switch, I heard Logan in the kitchen, moving around in his cage. Which meant...he was NOT in my room, and SOMETHING else was...and it was moving around in my bed.

My heart was pounding as I threw the switch...and Lance sat up in bed. He could tell I was scared, and asked what was wrong. I couldn't figure out what he was doing home, and why he was in bed. Then I realized what day it was--Sunday morning, 3 am--and he had been home since Friday night. For some reason, I thought it was Thursday night, and that he was gone. I just kept repeating "I thought you were traveling, I thought you were gone!" over and over until I was totally awake, and had the chance to calm down.

My heart was going crazy, but lucky for me, I fell back asleep. Lancer wasn't so lucky--he couldn't fall asleep for 3 hours. I kind of hoped he had forgotten what happened until he woke me up with the line "Good Morning Freaky!!!!"

So much for that.

Visualize Whirled Peas

I've been dreaming of Anderson's Split Pea Soup. Remember when we ate there for the very first time?? I bought 2 bags of split peas, and promised to whip up a batch in my crockpot when it got cooler. Today was that day, and out came the legendary peas!

I deviated from the recipe on the bag a tiny bit, but it was just as tasty as Anderson's, just a bit heartier. It also has ham in it, which adds great flavor and makes it a more substantial meal. The recipe is naturally gluten-free, so if you have the enormous pleasure of being allergic to wheat like me, you're in luck. What fun we have with our diets!! I should be 100 lbs, considering the fact that I can't eat carbs. And yet...I find myself at Jazzercise. Go figure.

Recipe below. Enjoy!

Split Pea Soup in the Crockpot
1 lb package of dried green split peas
2 cups diced ham
3 carrots, peeled and sliced
1 onion, diced

3 ribs of celery chopped
2 cloves of garlic, minced
1 bay leaf
1/4 cup fresh parsley, chopped
1 tbsp. seasoned salt
1/2 tsp. fresh pepper
5 1/2 cups hot water

1. Layer ingredients in the crock pot in the order that they’re listed and pour in water. Do not stir ingredients.
2. Cover and cook on high 4 to 5 hours or on low 8 to 10 hours until peas are very soft. Remove bay leaf. Serve. Earn rave reviews. Cite me as inspiration.

Eddy C is my Homeboy

Giggle-giggle, swoon-swoon...

Saturday matinee anyone? I need more. Lots more.

We certainly had fun while waiting for the movie to start. First, a 12year old girl became so overcome by the thought of Edward that she hyperventilated, threw up, and had to be attended to by Firemen and Paramedics. Of course, we laughed at her...until the movie started, and our friend's date asked if they needed to come back for us. It's not like we were hyperventilating...but I'm sure our breathing quickened, and we looked rather faint. Sigh.

I got to try on Jo's fabulous engagement ring...

Amy got to sit on a cute boy's lap...

I got to hug Johanan and talk about my bridesmaids dress for her wedding...


And talk about the hotness that is Edward with the Girlies..

Pantry

Here's my clean, new, organized pantry. Feel free to swing by for some canned goods.


Let's not kid ourselves. This thing will be shot to hell in about two weeks...but I will enjoy it until then.

Dear Santa...No Britney

I'm really trying to avoid a repeat of the humiliation that came with not assembling my Halloween Village this year. I got busy, I was a little lazy, and I just couldn't get the stupid thing up. I really don't want the same thing to happen with my Christmas Village. The bad part is, I'm already feeling a little busy and lotta lazy...but I do have a few weeks left to get it done.

I'm thinking that some good old fashioned Christmas music is exactly what I need, but the compilation albums are the WORST! Do you have a mix that you love? I'm all too willing to buy it on Itunes if you do.

Songs I will shell out duckets for:
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
Silent Night
Oh Holy Night
It Came Upon a Midnight Clear
First Noel
White Christmas
Winter Wonderland
Sleigh Ride
Let it Snow
The Most Wonderful Time of The Year
All I want for Christmas--Mariah--it's the best!
Holly Jolly Christmas
Rudolph
Rockin Around the Christmas tree
Jingle Bell Rock (Mean Girls anyone?? Insert butt slap here!!)
Little Drummer Boy
Jingle Bells
Last Christmas by Wham--my year-round ring tone!
Baby It's Cold Outside
Nutcracker

Songs/Singers I DO NOT WANT:
Britney Spears
NSync
Michael 'Gag Me' Bolton
Elvis
Gloria Estefan
Country Singers
Luther Vandross
My Grown Up Christmas Wish
Celine Dion
Wonderful Christmastime
Do They Know it's Christmas?" Don't know, Don't care.
Santa Baby, esp the one by Madonna
Grandma Got Runned Over by a Reindeer--I once dated someone who touted this as his "fave Christmas song ever." We broke up.
Beyonce
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

What are your fave holiday songs? Which one make you want to barf? Do you have a mix you love?

My Latest Article for SFBayStyle

http://sfbaystyle.typepad.com/blog/2008/11/an-unforgettabl.html#more

Some fun personal pics from the event:

Giving the old MB a shout-out for Lancer:

Sweet old car!

Forget Eggnog & Gingerbread

This is my *true* holiday favorite:


I LOVE these California Cutie Clementines. They come in their own little box, are easy to peel, fairly cheap, super sweet, totally tasty, help me ward off colds, and there aren't usually more than 2 mankers in the whole little crate.

That, and the fact that Lancer pulls off the "cutie" stickers, and puts them on my jackets. Swoon.

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

Dobbie has been a VERY bad boy this evening. It started out all fine and dandy. I complained (again) about our ghetto 50's pantry. It had these heavy inside doors that would always get stuck, and we could never get to the good stuff behind them. We were planning on opening it up and ripping out the inside doors--well, tonight, we did just that. Then we noticed the annoying board running down the front, and Lance got his saw out and hacked it off.

While he did all of this, I was grilling up some chicken for dinner. I had to help him find a box (all right, all right--I admit the box of boxes came in handy) for all of the spoiled, unreachable food.

When we came back in, this is what we found:


And, when we looked down on the floor, this is what we saw:


This is dinner we each ended up having:


And, this is what Dobbie's night looked like:


The gall of this dog. Plus, isn't he a little old to be scrounging around and stealing all of our food? In dog years, he's a 28 year old. I have a 28 year old food-stealing son. Time for the big guy to start picthing in and earning his keep if you ask me. It starts with finding his own food supply, and keeping his grubby paws off my chicken dinner!

You Say Potato, I Say Disgusting

I made a tasty crockpot roast on Sunday. I had picked up some carrots and potatoes a few days before--however, when I went to pull the potatoes out, the bag was all damp. Then I took a peek inside, and this is what I found:


Ga-rody. Lance casually shrugged his shoulders, and stated that I should just cut off the "little appendages" and "toss 'em in the crockpot."

Seriously--I put it to a vote. Would you ever, ever eat these potatoes? Tyler A, you're not allowed to vote, because you once ate suspicious berries and cannot be trusted. ;)

For the record, these creepy taters did *not* make it into the pot.

The Greatest Duracell Ad Ever

When I was 8, my parents got me a Glow-Worm for my baptism. I was a little old for it, but used it as a makeshift nightlight when making illicit midnight cookie raids--I never had to flip on the lights, and generally went undetected.

It was tucked away since then, and I pulled it out my save-it box a few days ago to put it in my closet. I gave it a good squeeze for old times sake....and looksi what happened:



I'm 32. Do the math, peeps. Do the math.

How Many Licks??

This post by our friend made me laugh. I took candy, and customer service in general, *very* seriously as a kid. When my sister was going through some old family boxes, she found a letter written by me when I was probably 8 or so. It was written on the duck stationery I likely stole from my sister--I know this because my paper always had pigs and hers always had ducks. Here's what it said:

Dear Paula Young Wig Company,

Thank you so much for your fine wigs. I really like them. I think it's nice that you have such nice wigs. Thank you again for your wonderful wigs.

Love,
Kaari


The poor Paula Young wig company--they probably thought I was a little bald cancer victim. The truth was far less sad and far more funny--I was just a weird kid who felt it was her duty to give nice feedback. I called and wrote shampoo companies, toy companies, and food companies all the time.

Back to the importance and seriousness of candy. Sadly, I fell for the the old 'you get a free Tootsie Pop if your wrapper has an Indian pointing to the star' rumor. I ate a LOT of suckers, wildly scouring the wrapper for said Indian. I saved up five of them, and was beyond glee as I stole a stamp, mailed them in to the Tootsie Pop company, and waited for the free suckers to be sent to me. I waited and waited and waited and waited...you get the idea.


Part of me is glad that Brett called up the evil candy empire and put them on the spot. On a candy related note, Tootsie Pop is offering up 50k to the reader that is able to accurately guess the amount of licks it truly takes to get to the center. Mr. Owl is waiting below:

http://www.askmrowl.biz

Forgive me, I am on my way to collect 50k, and long-awaited redemption from the good peeps at Tootsie.

Dog Days

I love vintage art.

I love dogs.

I love vintage-y art starring dogs.

Therefore, I love these:

I'd like to think of Gogie serving up a lemon yellow cake, a flavor that complements his shiny yellow coat....but in reality, tubbs would be scarfing it down and acting like we never feed him.

Get Those Jazz Hands Ready!

I've decided to take my workout routine seriously--I'm adding in a little jazz. Yes, I'm going to start Jazzercise classes at the local community center. I need to get out of the house and do something loud, fast and fun, and Jazzercise seems perfect. Of course, it has to overcome the whole "80's" thing, and the fact that Lancer keeps teasing me about my geriatric workout buddies. However--I was pleasantly surprised to see that they overhauled it. It incorporates the trademark dancing and music--however, they mixed in pilates, yoga, kick-boxing, weights and stretching so it's a good cardio workout with the benefit of weights. Jazzercise=maximum de-chubbing=maximum hotness.

I am slightly worried about the fact that one of the routines includes a sassy little move--apparently, you lick your finger, touch your booty, and make a sizzling sound. But I am trying to put "The Sizzler" out of my mind.

I'm taking my "fat" photos tonight. I won't be posting those--ever. However, I will be more than happy to post the results of my smokin' hot new Jazzy body...you know, when I get it.

Nate the Great

As many of you may know, I funded my obscenely expensive private schooling by studying hard, working even harder, and by playing Mary Poppins to 3 wonderful children for many, many years. It has come to my attention that one of them has *finally* surpassed me in coolness, which isn't easy to do. Here is a timeline of how this happened:

1. I arrive in Portola Valley as a corn-fed Iowan girl. I meet the kiddio's...Miranda, Nathan and Hillary Ford.
2. The children immediately love and adore me. We become pseudo-siblings 4 life.
3. Nate starts playing every sport known to man.
4. I sneak the kids Mcd's (which we jokingly referred to as 'healthy turkey sandwiches') and let them watch TV (against the parents orders...sorry!) when they had certifiable illnesses, like chicken pox. Less certifiable ilnesses, like headaches or upset tummy's (minus certifiable barf) landed them in bed all day to ready books.
5. Nate and I wrestle...and he beats me. I decide we can no longer wrestle.
6. Nate starts to accel at baseball and football.
7. The kids continue to grow up...and I graduate from USF and run off with Lancer into the sunset.
8. I get to come back and escort him to his Senior Prom Parties...I take a million pictures, like an annoying older sister would.
9. Nate gets accepted to Cornell, and is the QB.
10. Nate gets a shout-out from Dwight on the Office. It is at this moment that he becomes cooler than me. Watch below--start watching around 3:50 so it makes sense:

http://www.nbc.com/The_Office/video/episodes/#vid=800181

And, just for the record, he will always be Newtie, little bro, to me. Now I have to figure out how to get a name check on Gossip Girl so I am in the lead on coolness again. Any suggestions on how to make that happen???

Speechless

I have a feeling it will be hard to sleep tonight. I am so excited! I hope this new administration brings the peace, stability, progress and change that I feel we need now more than ever. What an unforgettable night--I feel so privileged to have been part of this monumental election.

Perhaps it's just me--but I seriously have TuPac's 'Changes' going through my head, yo. It can't just be me, right?? I blame my ghetto-rap loving days (seriously..don't challenge me to a Dre or Snoop-off..I will eat you alive) but I have been thinking about this line, and how even a few years ago, this day seemed out of reach: "although it seems heaven-sent, we ain't ready to see a black president."

Yeah, I just quoted Tupac, and it's grammatically incorrect. However-- I'm sure he's hanging with Biggie in heaven, feeling just as happy as the rest of us.

Pumpkin Pooch

We dressed Gogie up in his lil' pumkin neckerchief for Halloween. He was quite thrilled to dress up and hand out candy to the 12 trick-or-treaters who came knockin' on our door. Lame turnout due to bad weather. Oh well. Lance pointed out that he wasn't sure who enjoyed dressing up more--me or Lil Guy. I suspect it was me.

Jason Dobbie:

All tuckered out from Halloween Parties:

As for me, I'm with Dobbie. I was so tired of the Halloween festivities--I never thought I would say that. But 4 parties and 5 costume changes later, I couldn't wait for November. Time to start pulling out my Christmas Village pieces!

Calistoga

Lancer has been under a fair amount of stress in the last few weeks. We thought about heading to Vegas or Palm Springs...but then decided to pack up and head back to the Napa Valley.

This time, we decided to camp out in Calistoga, a fun and quaint little town in Wine Country. We stayed at Dr. Wilkinson's--this place is a serious trip. It's from the 1950's, and I feel like June Cleaver taking a spin in the mud baths. It's hilarious--I love that they haven't updated it at all.


They have 3 natural springs--two outdoor, and one indoor--the water is so warm and relaxing.


We got up early and headed down to the spa. I was hoping Lancer would enjoy the mud bath--it's certainly not for everyone. It's a little stinky, with a mixture of hot peat moss and volcanic ash. But he really enjoyed it. We got a special package that included a mud bath, mud mask, mineral bath, steam room, blanket wrap and massage. The other great thing about the good Doctor's place is that it's very affordable--it's a good, basic "no-frills" spa.

That's not me in the mud. Cameras are not allowed, as you're in the mud all nekki.

We dined on some seriously tasty vittles:

At Bouchon, I started out with the mixed greens topped with a red wine vinaigrette, warm goat cheese and herbs de provence. Lancer snatched up the onion soup, and I have to say, it was one of the top 5 things I have ever eaten. I then moved on to the halibut atop caramelized onions and heirloom tomatoes in a tomato broth. To die for. Lancer pigged out on the trout topped with green beans and almonds. After lunch, we hit the Bouchon Bakery for some tarts, cookies, and a peanut butter cup the size of my head. A foodie's dream come true. :)

After lunch, we headed back for a kip, a swim, and then went to Greystone for dinner @ the CIA. As always, it didn't disappoint. We shared an apple salad, and then Lancer got the chicken while I got the steak. He ended with the pear tart, and I got the creme brulee. TO DIE FOR.

We also picked up this funny horse for our garden:

And I got to break in my new European walking shoes--yay:

We reluctantly mozied our way back home today totally relaxed, recharged and ready to go. Plus, we got to bring back some of our favorite spoils from Bouchon and Woodhouse. Yum-o.