It's official. I am divorcing the YMCA. Yes, once we were in love, and the Y was meeting all of my needs. Then the Y started deleting all of my favorite classes-I may or may not be referring to water aerobics.
Then I started changing. B is still taking 2 naps a day, and it's impossible to squeeze one in before, during or after her naps. She wakes up, we eat breakfast together, and then we head off for our daily morning adventures. After said adventures, we come home, eat lunch (occasionally chicken nuggets passed into the backseat) and then it's off to nap. Meanwhile, I'm homebound for the several hours while she naps. Forget a post dinnertime workout.
So here's my new plan of action
1. Break up with the Y.
2. Borrow my friends treadmill, as it's just taking up space in her garage. I can catch up on trashy shows while Little Lady Lance naps the afternoon away. Or after she goes down for the night. Win-Win!
3. Get my Jazz on again...at Jazzercise! Since I had B, a new studio opened up, and they have an afternoon class twice a week that offers childcare, and happens to be a mile from my house. Score!
4. Bust out the jogger, and hit the trails now that it's fall, and the weather is cooler.
The only thing I'm worried about is the latest Jazzercise gimmick--they show up and do flash mob dances in unexpected places. See the ladies in action at our beloved Santana Row! Since I will be a star dancer, I'm sure they'll expect me to lead one of these, and I'll have to come up with a clever excuse. Or disguise.
The worst part is that I convinced all of my friends that the Y was great, and they all joined. So many friends, in fact, that they promised to send me a Target giftcard as a thanks for referring my entire circle of friends to them, and they never paid up! YMCA, it's you, not me! You're cheap and unaccommodating. You may have all of my friends, but you shall never have me again!
8 comments:
WHAT?!?!?
I think you are out of your mind. But that's just because I am so so happy with the Y. (You do deserve a giftcard.) But I get it--if it's not working for you, it's not working for you. And no need to drop the cash.
It also boggles my mind that B takes two naps a day. Lovely.
Your spooktacular badge mocks me.
And if I ever see you Jazzercising in a flash mob, I will pee my pants.
Kaari--
I'm thinking of filing a complaint for false advertising. I was excited to get some celebrity gossip on J.Lo and Marc Anthony, only to find out that they weren't even mentioned anywhere in your post! I'm so disappointed!! ;)
If you do decide to lead one of those jazz flash mobs, please be sure to get the time and place right. I'd hate for you to end up like the guy in the AT&T commercial:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bd8ppk0UCx8
Good luck with your new POA!
Greg--
First of all, we need to address your dissing of Donnie. NOT COOl, Man! Blog crush over! You should click on the NKOTB tag to see just how deeply the love runs. It's deep. Donnie Osmond my a#$!
Second, I love that commercial...We are!! Haha.
Third, who cares about dumb Jlo and her ratty ex. Not me. Now if we're swapping Diddy dramz, I'm in! I heard they were ca-razy together!
Kaari--
My comment about Donnie was so three posts ago.
However, I can't let that type of challenge go unanswered. So I went ahead and clicked on your NKOTB tags...
...and found myself on your epic July 6, 2011 post. And by "epic" I mean "saga." I had no idea you were such a huge fan!
Of course, I couldn't stop there and soon found myself at your March 31, 2010 post. I was so sad to read that you were (at one point) ready give up NKOTB. I almost couldn't bring myself to read the entire thing!
Fortunately, I did and felt a bit foolish when I realized that I had fallen victim to your April Fools' prank that was a over a year and a half old!
Well at least I'm relieved to know that your loyalty to NKOTB continues unabated.
Your impassioned posts about NKOTB make me feel a bit like King Agrippa whom I'll paraphrase to say: "Almost thou persuadest me to be a NKOTB fan."
Even though we may have to "agree to disagree then", I'm not too proud to admit when I make a mistake.
Perhaps I was too quick to diss Donnie W. Let's just say that any offense was completely unintentional and my hastily conceived comment was borne more from my own sense of loyalty to Donnie O. and the rest of the Osmond clan.
I hope you can accept my deepest apologies.
(and, if it's any consolation, I've always been a fan of Marky Mark...)
AH! That Jazzercies routine is really horrible.
The jazzercise flash mob makes me cringe. It brings back too many memories of my mom dragging me and ashley to Jazzercise over the years.
Greg is high. Both Donnys totally suck. Donny Osmond looks like a woman now that he has had so much work done and your beloved Donny is just old and washed up.
As for the Y. I salute you for knowing what works for you and what doesn't. I have to have a gym to go to with specific times because I will never put my trash on a treadmill at home.
First of all, I would go into the Y and casually joke with the front desk about not receiving your gift card. As soon as they hand it over, cancel your membership and high tail it out of there never to show your face again.
The flash mob thing is really freaking me out. Are they trying to use that as a recruiting mechanism, because I think that is going to hurt business.
I am always devastated when long-time running Hollywood couples call it splits-ville. However, the news about J Lo & Mr. Anthony was refreshing...I always thought she was WAY too good for him. But I am devastated about your calling it splits-ville with the Y. That's my plan of attack for gettin my booty back. Well, maybe, after I convince Tat.
I am with Ashley, I want to see you mob it up. In fact, why don't we plan our own?
& I should have commented this earlier in the week but got lazy:
Halloween party was great! Food was exceptional, & carmel apples did not disappoint. Thanks!
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