5 Bad Brothers From Beantown

Last weekend was truly epic. The NKOTBSB show was a dream come true in so many ways. Let's review the entire night in painful (for you) detail.


I arrived in LA without any delays--woo-hoo! I was paranoid all day that my flight would be canceled, that I would get stuck in security, etc. I even thought about skipping lunch, fearing it would give me food poisoning and keep me from my Bostonian fellas. But the prospect of passing out set me straight. Plus, I didn't want to be lightheaded, and blurt out "I carried a watermelon!!" when I finally met Donnie.

I picked up my sweet ride--it had Sirius radio, and I got to rock out to the 80's and 90's stations...

...after spending 10 minutes trying to figure out how to use the keyless system. Seriously--it's not that hard to use a key. Why the "upgrade" to keyless? This car freaked me out.

I checked into our slightly sketchy and stale hotel, and was greeted by this Norman Bates shower

And this generously stocked towel rack. What the what??

But I knew I really only needed an outlet for my flatiron, and a semi-decent bed for what would be 2 hours of sleep. And, it was only $89 a night. And it was walking distance to the Staples center. It was hilarious--there was an anime festival at Staples, too. Half the people were Japanese cartoon characters, half were Blockheads. It was quite a scene. We thought they were all weird and crazy, and I'm guessing they returned the favor.

We met up with the rest of our group, and got checked in. This is us showing off our Five Star badges granting us full access to the boys.

We also got a bag stuffed with NKOTB goodies

Including this cute pink t-shirt

And little black boyshorts that I'm sure Lancer would find sexy until he saw NKOTB emblazoned on them.

And then it was time to get the party started!! I made a deal with myself--I didn't care if I was next to Donnie in the photo as long as I got to say hello, have a little chat, and squeeze a hug out of him.

As soon as we got into the room, it was pure chaos! The details are all a little hazy. If you ever need to commit murder, do it at a NKOTB Meet and Greet. I have no idea what happened in that room.

All I know is that I ended up next to Jon--who is my second favorite in the group. That was all good.

We've tweeted before, but I don't blog about it because he's very private, and on the shy side. He read my blog post about Lancer meeting them in Germany and he wrote back "What you weren't even with him at the airport????? OMG you scored Kaari! He is a keeper! NKOTB loves Lance! LOL."

He's good people--cute as can be, and a very good hugger.

And Donnie ended up with....this. Doesn't he look thrilled?

Looking back, I should have realized that there were two types of people in my group. The Blockheads, and, um, The Non-Blockheads. Blockheads are fun and classy girls that "love" the boys, and go to the shows to have a good time with their friends, but have a real life that includes husbands and kids. The Non-Blockheads go to try and hook up with and "love" the guys. Ew.

But no worries, right? I chatted with Jon, hugged Joe, hugged Danny, hugged and chatted twice with Jordan (Eriika's boyfriend--more on this in a minute) and then made my way over to Donnie for my FACETIME. But did I get it?? Nada. And why is that? Cause mico-mini fishnets was literally HANGING around Donnie's neck unleashing a stalkerlike tirade about how she had been trying to reach him, but she couldn't get through, she never heard back, blah, blah blah. Hobag-Skankwad hijacked my time with Donnie!! I waited 22 years for this, and I was blocked by this woman. By the time he peeled her off of him (and started eying security, I kid you not) the session was over and we were being escorted out.

Undaunted, I ran over to Donnie and gave him a hug. And by that, I mean he stood there while I stole a side hug, that was followed up by a man slap to my shoulder. And that was that. It was wildly underwhelming. I was most disappointed by the fact that this woman was allowed to dominate his time like that, and that a real fan like me was brushed aside. But to be fair, the Meet and Greets are unpredictable, wild, and go by really fast. There are no guarantees. Such is life.

Okay, back to Jordan. I briefly hugged him when I first walked into the room...but he wanted a second helping of Mostess, and came back for more after the picture! My friend Carolyn claims this never happened, but it's clear she was overwhelmed, and blinded by jealousy. After all, Jordan was talking to her, and then she ran away from him. She doesn't know why, and couldn't explain it--she totally carried a watermelon. Haha! :) We got a little chat in, and I did Eriika proud.

After the chaos, we headed down to the arena to grab some dinner, and get ready for the show.

The fans were very funny and creative

We had 5th row tickets. They were absolutely amazing!! We were this close to the boys. Squeal!!

The obligatory concert shots--they show how close we were to the action!

You know what's going on in this picture--a little oh, oh, oh, oh....oh, oh, oh, oh!

This is Jordan, looking for me in the crowd. I'm betting money that he wanted a third helping--and who could blame him? Truthfully, he spent a considerable portion of the evening looking at us--throwing smiles our way, winking at us, singing to us. Of course, Carolyn assured me he was only looking at her, and angrily protested when I considered converting to Jordanism.


I can't lie--I wasn't all that excited about BSB, and merely tolerated them so I could see NK. But they totally won me over! They were fun, engaging, and energetic. Plus, because I spent a great deal of the 90's clubbing, I knew all of their songs.


At some point, Donnie ripped off his shirt, and it stayed missing for several songs. No complaints. Mind you, this man is in his 40's!

At one point in the concert, the back half of the stadium started going totally crazy. Because we were so close to the front, we couldn't see what was going on. All of the sudden, we realized that the missing BSB--Kevin Richardson--had appeared out of nowhere on the B stage to join the rest of the group. Kev is in the grey suit. He totally looks like Christin Bale. The LA show was the only concert he appeared out--lucky us! It was really cool to have all 10 original members on the stage together.

After that, Nick got all up in my grill

Then Donnie

Then AJ

The transition between the bands onstage was seamless. They integrated well, and it was hilarious to see 2 generations of crazies in one place together. The set list was fabulous, and the performances were stellar. Joe and Jordan definitely turned it out. At one point, Joe went sliding down the catwalk on his knees. I think that move won him a few new fans. Blockheads like me undoubtedly noticed a few touches throughout the show--dance moves from old videos, etc. Funny stuff.

And then the boys all joined forces for a few more songs together before calling it a night

Of course, the confetti canons rained down upon the crowd--I love that they always do that

We headed across the street to Donnie's official afterparty. I have to say, for jumping up and down and screaming like banshees for 3 hours, we still looked pretty hot!

I have to be straight up about the afterparty--it bit. It pains me to say that, because I am still a Donnie girl at heart. NKOTB was my first concert, Donnie was my first crush--the loyalty and love runs deep. But this was a total and utter display of D-baggery.

D at the afterparty

It was bad enough that we had waited close to 2 hours for him to show up. When he did, he repeatedly lifted his shirt up for no reason. It was very Situation-ish, and I wanted to tell him to stop.

Seriously, folks.

Just when I thought the overt display of d-baggery was over, he nearly ruined me for life by making the crowd change the lyrics from Toni Basil's "Micky" to "Donnie." As in, oh, Donnie, you're so fine, you're so fine, you blow my mind---hey Donnie! Hey Donnie!"

To add insult to injury, he then pretended to be embarassed by the attention. Um, why? You made us do it. I thought the night would get better, but we decided to bolt after he declared that we would be changing Bon Jovi's line "Tommy used to work on the docks" to "Donnie used to work on the docks." Buh-bye. Cue me running from the club, my 7th grade dreams shattered. It did for Donnie what Jordan's stint on the surreal life did for his fans--nothing good.

We did an obligatory IHOP stop before heading back to our likely untimely death at our hotel for what turned out to be 2 hours of sleep.

I caught my flight back, and came home to crash while Lancer entertained B for the day. And then I did it all over again for the San Jose show.

Part Two

Prego Hayley doing a little 'get down, get down, and move it all around' action in the stands.

The crazy crowd--yes, it was sold out--AGAIN!

Danny came up into our section during Tonight, and I got a few handfuls of his arms. He got totally mobbed, but fared much better than Jordan. Some chick grabbed his junk, and sent him falling to his knees. She was probably a BSB fan.

Welcome to the gun show!

Ha! Here we are together. A most unflattering shot of me, but I LOVE his smile!

The LA show was a ton of fun--but the San Jose show KILLED IT again! The crowd was loud and completely crazy. The screams were deafening. I came home voiceless and deaf, which delighted me beyond words.

After some deep soul-searching, I came to the following conclusions:

1. NKOTB are best as a group. Splintering off and/or hosting solo parties doesn't lead to anything good. I will never go to one again.

2. As amazing and fun as the Meet and Greet was, it was an unnatural setting. I prefer interacting with them in a more organic way. It was crazy fun attacking Danny on the stairs.

3. I will always be a Donnie girl, but I certainly have a new appreciation for the other members--especially Jordan and Joe, who really showcased their vocal ranges on this tour.

4. I'm weirded out that people keep asking Lancer if he's jealous that I hugged Donnie. It's cool--we're not in 7th grade.

5. The 2012 cruise is calling my name. It's totally organic.