Monday, July 8, 2013

To Know Me is to Love Me--Unless Your Name is Donnie

Yes, I had an epic NKOTB night.

 Yes, I shall blog about it later.

 But right now I have some pressing issues that need to be addressed. After the LA show two years ago, I explained that there were two types of fans--Blockheads and groupies. I forgot to mention that there's a third kind of fan, the kind I also don't associate with, and avoid at all cost. The BSC. It's code for bat shiz cray. These girls are THE WORST. They stir up drama at every turn, monopolize the guys at the meet and greets, think they own the guys and have a "real" connection with them, yell at the guys on Twitter, etc. In fact, poor Donnie referenced them last week on Twitter. He wrote something to the effect of "just because I follow you on Twitter, it does NOT give you the right to lose your marbles at me. Wish I hadn't checked my inbox." It's hard out here for Dub.

 Just so we're clear.

Blockhead: 
Wait in rain, in lines, in heat, and in the dark for the guys
Jump and scream at concerts
 Silly antics to get close to the guys, but are respectful of their space
"Bend the rules" to gain access to a private event, but never steal someone else's spot
Have fun at meet and greets, and share your guy with the other girl in the picture
Send fun and uplifting tweets, and write funny things on their Insta pics

BSC: 
Send demanding/threatening/hostile messages to the guys
Stir up drama with BH's
Get drunk, crazy, and posessive
 Act like you own the men, and that they somehow owe you something
Push/shove/yell at people at the After Party (srsly, people)

Obvs, I am a BH, and not a BSC. But somewhere along the line, I think Donnie got me confused with a BSC, and I think he sort of hates me. I kid you not. At first, I thought it was because he wasn't into blonds. Then I thought it was because he was tired, or the groupie stole his time in LA at my meet and greet...but I am slowly realizing that he actually dislikes me. He has a great memory, and will totally freeze out anyone who acts BSC on him. Peeps, I am suffering from a case of mistaken identity! He either looks right through me, avoids my gaze completely, or gives me a look that says he wants me to go away. He came down my aisle last night and kissed the 2 girls right across from me. Burn.

 I told a funny joke at my meet and greet, and he gave me nuthin. Not even a little laugh. Then my friend who's a Jordan asked how he was doing, and he responded "the question is how are YOU doing, girl?" WHAT. THE. HELL. He hates me.

 But you know who doesn't hate me? This guy! 


I digress. After a quarter of a century of loving this Dub (yes, 25 years--this is SERIOUS, people) I thought the only thing keeping us from being magical music soulmates and BH for life was the fact that we hadn't met. Now I feel like I've been railroaded by some crazy chick somewhere who did something that bugged him, and it's sort of ruining my dreams.

Two options: Switch teams to Jordan. That guy LOVES me. He's everything I thought Dub would be, and more. Attentive, touchy, funny, sweet, and flirty. I make eye contact with him every time I see him, and always get a smile, wink, or something else tossed my way. It's fabulous.

Change up my look. Wear my hair curly, don my glasses. That kind of thing. I'm not sure it will help, but it certainly can't hurt.

Weigh in. I got one more shot on Friday night, and I need to know which direction to go.

Post Production Note: If you're a longtime reader of my blog, you will know this post is in jest. NKOTB/Donnie will always have a piece of my heart. I don't think Dub is a jerk, or that he actually hates me. In fact, I've never known a band to do more for their fans than these 5 guys. I just think the universe is against us, and I have two choices: soldier on and chase the dream, or convert to Jordanism. Decisions, decisions....

3 comments:

brooke said...

I say you go Team Jordan from here on out. Donny is dead to you. 25 years is nothin. I spent 13 years MARRIED to a man who is now dead to me. You have been nothing but classy and sweet to Donny and he treats you like crap. you deserve more than that!

Ashley said...

I want so bad to know what Eriika would make of all this! Wasn't she always a Jordan? To know you really is to love you. I don't get Donnie. I have to say I have lost respect for him through this whole ordeal. How can we love or even respect a man who doesn't realize how lucky he is to be with you? I say be proud of conquering this goal and switch to Jordan at once. I know we have opposite taste in men, but I think he is cuter anyway. Is he the gay one? Doesn't matter!

Em said...

I am so late in reading this! But as per usual, I agree with the two Warners. Donnie doesn't know how damn lucky he is/was. ...Although, according to Instagram you had your moment in the sun with Donnie?

Maybe we need an update.

And I just reread your tribute to Ashley and have to say that she was so excited about your being pregnant with B, that she may have hinted to me about it before you announced it (and before I officially 'met' you). ;) I kept it a secret, don't worry.